We all go through things: Bad things, good things, and in the middle things. But, however good or bad we have it, we want it better and not worse.
The way I look at things is this: We are as satisfied, understanding and happy as we make up our minds to be.
It does not matter where I am, how it is going or “why it screws up” or “messes up”. I am patient. What is the point of “losing cool”, “going banana crazed” or imploding or exploding with anger. It genuinely solves nothing.
Anger tends to filter through most of the other emotions anyway. Somewhere inside of that mess of emotions that have the power to overwhelm, upset and throw your life out of balance you will most probably find some anger, if only a hint.
The Dalai Lama further stated; to deal with our problems, we need to be practical and realistic.
If we are to be realistic, we need to use our human intelligence properly, which means we need a calm mind.
When your life feels like it is a mess and you are ready to take some action there are many different approaches to take.
Â (Support from a professional or wise friend, mediation, spiritual beliefs, some times even just taking a ‘time out’ holiday can help etc) Find the one that suits your personality and lifestyle best. At this point what you are hoping to find is to be calmer. This will allow your mind to be more realistic again. You are more likely to stay on track with making the necessary changes with a realistic mind.
These 11 suggestions are one approach you could take that might be helpful:
- The most important step is making sure you are truly ready to clean up your life. This means you will need time for yourself and be dedicated to this ‘project’.
- Find some time that allows you to stop, slow down and sit quietly.
- Think about what it is going on. What is giving you this feeling that your life is a mess? Is it one particular issue, or several? Do you feel you lack direction or do not have a goal?
- Picture how you would like it to be. Hold that image in your head.
- How would you like to feel? Hold that feeling.
- Write down specifically what is going on that is not okay. What needs to change?
- Look at what you have written and make a list of exactly what needs to change.
- Rewrite the list in order of priority. Be very realistic and practical. Ask yourself: can I actually make some of these changes happen?
- Imagine a ladder; each rung on the ladder represents the changes necessary.
- Accept the fact that you will get to the top one step at a time, not in one swoop.
- What exactly you have to do to take the first step?
Remember that life is complicated and can be more difficult at times. Clearing your life up, getting rid of the dead wood and finding your place of balance forms a wonderful basis. This is the best most powerful place to work from, and come back to when things have are difficult. Being familiar with the feeling of being in balance allows you to know exactly what you want to get back to. This also offers you the goal to strive for. My suggestion is that clearing your life up means having found your place of balance.